November 22nd, 2011 
jvremec
Parenting Children for Success
Parents often deal with their kids the way they were disciplined. This may involve archaic notions about parenting that no longer work in today’s world with children. It is not unusual for adults to believe that parenting primarily involves the use of power and control. In William Glasser’s book, The Identity Society, he makes the point that the nature of parenting has changed over the last several decades.
Authority figures are no longer respected by virtue of the role they play. Teenagers are no longer compliant merely because their parents bark out orders. Glasser is very pragmatic about this issue. It’s not a matter of what’s right or wrong with reference to the values of parenting, it’s what works. Typically, using control tactics no longer work with kids. Many teachers have a problem grasping this concept. They believe that they can coerce kids into doing schoolwork. It usually doesn’t impact the child. Parents try to act authoritarian around their children and it backfires. Discipline is about role modeling respect, being firm, setting appropriate limits, and establishing consequences.
For parents, “stepping out of the bubble” may mean viewing the parenting process from a different perspective. It may mean giving up the image of parenting that was established during their childhood. Sometimes, parents will internalize the image of parenting that was handed down to them even if that perception was intolerable. Sometimes caretaking for our kids involves doing the opposite of what was done to us. We need to get in touch with the child within us. We need to remember what it was like to play and have fun. If our childhood wasn’t fun, then we need to do some grief work and vow to make things different with our own children. If our inner-parent is critical, we will most likely have unrealistic expectation for our children. We need to listen to the inner-critic and let it speak. We may hear tones of the tyranny of the “shoulds.” The inner-critic or inner- parent is full of moral injunctions. It is the judge and jury of our behavior. Combine that subpersonality with the pusher-driver part of us and you have a toxic combination. The pusher-driver is the inner part of us that says, “What I am doing is not good enough. I must always try harder.” Parents need to get in touch with the inner-critic and the pusher-driver and identify with their contents and then detach. Parents will want to rationally respond to these subpersonalities with more reasonable ways of viewing specific issues. This process of rational responding will assist in clearing up the “muddy water” when it come to coaching and advising our own children.
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Atheists please, any good personal-growth book title or author?
Have you read any motivating book between those popular personal growth books that you find intersting and not against your ideas as an atheist as well?
i enjoyed reading
the art of happiness
by
the dalai llama
Does reading books on personal growth helps?
Does reading books on personal growth helps ? I have never gone through such a book in depth and followed it.
But I have just got many remarks from people . some people say that they help . some people say that they do not help or may be they just help initially for some time , not in long run.
If any of you have read some good personal growth book and have followed it in long run. Mention it and share your experience how it has helped you.
It depends on what your goals are. If you think that reading self-help books will make you an overall better person, you’re going to be disappointed. But if there is something specific in your life that you’re committed to changing, and you are willing to put the effort in, a book may be able to give you some ideas and techniques for doing so.
For example, if you want to reduce your debt and change how you manage your money, a self-help book can give you advice and suggestions on how to budget, consolidating debt, etc. But YOU have to commit to following the program if you want to see any changes.
If you’re looking for inner peace or something equally abstract, that’s much harder to measure. Again, I think a self-help book can be a guide, but you have to incorporate the ideas into your daily life – start doing yoga, meditating, counting your blessings, etc.
If you’re looking for a feel-good quick fix, a book might do that for you, but in the end it can’t change your life. It can be a helpful guide, but it’s not magic. Changing habits and old patterns is hard work.
Atheists please, any good personal-growth book title or author?(has been asked before)?
I’m asking for more valuable answers,
Have you read any motivating book between those popular personal growth books that you find intersting and not against your ideas as an atheist as well?
http://www.eckharttolle.com
The best personal growth books youve ever read?
If you could single out just 5 books you’ve read that are responsible for *helping* you achieve at least 80% of what you want in life…what would they be?
1. Catcher In The Rye – JD Salinger
2. The Phantom Tollbooth – Norton Juster
3. The Harry Potter Series (I know that’s not one book, but the overall morals and themes in this book have changed my views about myself and the world around me) – JK Rowling
4. The Giver – Lois Lowry
5. Black Like Me – John Howard Griffin